borrowed from gollumgollum

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This is, hands-down, the weirdest psychology test I’ve ever taken.

Seriously, half the questions had me going “AAAAAAAGHHHH whut?” They make no sense. And it’s all the harder because the instructions tell you not to tie the shapes to “any narrative or storyline,” which is like telling me to breathe without using my lungs. But I persevered, wondering sometimes if I was picking answers utterly at random, and then . . . .

Verbally and mentally fluid, you are refreshing and illuminating to those around you. This is occasionally somewhat discounted by the obvious pleasure that you take in exercising your mental acuity. Although generally peaceful you can often take a verbally aggressive tact in relations with the world, which can often be misunderstood by those around you. Innovative in the extreme, you can often think yourself right out of the correct answer to a given problem. Many times you are referred to as your own worst enemy. You tire very quickly of routine and so make poor clerks or administrative help. You also have no respect for authority and little patience for those you regard as inferior, most especially those in charge. Experimentation is your watchword and can occasionally lead to experience for its own sake and shallow decadence. Your thought can sometimes be scattered and disconnected.

. . . which, um, yeah. I wouldn’t agree on all counts (I’m not so much about experimentation), but it’s close enough to be unnerving. Makes me feel like the test was a bit of flashy misdirection while somebody picked my psychological pocket.

(Especially since I just added, then deleted, a [sic] after “tact” in that diagnosis. It should be “tack.” Grumble mutter </pedant>.)

Anyway, if you feel like melting your brain, the test only takes a couple of minutes — and that’s if, like me, you have to wrestle with the tendency to go “well maybe that big triangle is a ship and then the little one is about to ram no dammit I’m not suppposed to make up stories.” It probably goes faster without that.

0 Responses to “borrowed from gollumgollum”

  1. aliettedb

    Wow, that was weird…
    However, what I got is the polar opposite of my character (materialist engaged with physical world, likes extreme activities…), so obviously my pockets weren’t available for picking…

  2. Anonymous

    That was freaking bizarre.

    I’m inclined to the cynical view that almost all psychological tests are roughly at the same level as astrology, with the results given in glowing generalities that flatter the test-taker enough to not question the premise. At least, that’s how I read the results it gave me: “You have a poetic sensibility and an ability to see beyond the day to day. You often seem to be living in a higher realm, or to be not-of-this-earth….” Gee, thanks, how nice of you to call me sensitive and poetic! I guess I won’t complain about how arbitrary this all is.

    • Marie Brennan

      It depends on the variety of answers, for me. I’ve seen results from this test that do not sound at all like me (yours being one of them), so at the very least it isn’t playing too hard for the “grab bag of qualities in which anybody could see themselves” angle.

    • alpheratz

      Yeah, I agree with this. There were a couple of statements in mine that are fairly true of me, but everything else was either wrong, or general, or complimentary, that it would be pretty easy to concentrate on the correct aspects of the result (that are probably just coincidences) and not examine everything else.

      “Sometimes you neglect old friends in favor of a new or exciting acquaintance. You have a real difficulty being alone. Often you will seem to know how to handle a situation without exactly knowing HOW you know this. Your thoughts are often shallow.”

      I mean, aren’t all of these true for everybody sometimes?

      • Marie Brennan

        Hmmm — that one sounds more grab-bag than most of the answers I’ve read.

        • alpheratz

          It was about half of my result. The entire thing is:

          Your power comes from an ability to sense how things might be and to proclaim this possibility with a great force and willingness to act. You have a tendency to be romantic, and can be an idealist. This sense of how the world can be is often expressed with self-deprecatory humor. Because of your need to address the immediacy of the moment, you may not think things through to their logical end, relying instead on a feeling for how a situation SHOULD end. You need to be liked and appreciated by others, although your attention often wanders. Sometimes you neglect old friends in favor of a new or exciting acquaintance. You have a real difficulty being alone. Often you will seem to know how to handle a situation without exactly knowing HOW you know this. Your thoughts are often shallow. While in the excitement of the moment you can obsess about a task at hand. If it should become rote and unexciting, however, it can be dropped just as quickly.

          The last two sentences are definitely true for me (but I suspect it’s not really an uncommon trait either), as well as the self-deprecatory humor (same), but everything else ranges from not really to sometimes to definitely not.

          • Marie Brennan

            Danke.

            (I like seeing other results, because it’s an interesting exercise, trying to see how I would have responded to that result if I received it. Yours is not one I would have found much connection to.)

          • anghara

            Mine’s on my blog. It’s WEIRD.

      • pentane

        I would’ve LOLed if that was what I got. They may be grab bag, but that’s not my bag at all.

        my result:
        “You are in a perpetual quest to find the new, the exciting. Emotionally volatile, you are known for sudden changes of opinion, of appreciation, and behavior. Following rules and established methods is difficult for you and the difficulties of higher education are usually quite daunting. Knowledge is best gained through an intimate association with the matter at hand. Usually driven by attitudes and desires of the group, you are talented in an established field of endeavor. Emotions come and go without a strong understanding of their causes. They are unexpected guests in an otherwise placid landscape. You live by your own codes of conduct, which can be noble or terrible depending on the individual. Authority is meaningless to you. You hate to be predictable, at all costs. Rarely verbally effusive, you can at times feel as if your feelings are too deep for words. You are very observant, but rarely express these observations to others.”

        The only one I’d contest is ‘authority is meaningless’, but that’s because you can argue back and forth over what that means. I don’t respect authority that derives only from a title, and authority has meaning to me because defying authority usually results in a pain in my ass, which doesn’t interest me.

  3. wshaffer

    Actually, I kind of like the idea of “verbally agressive tact”.

    Then I took the test myself. WHAT? THE? HELL? I think I wanted to answer “Neither!” to about half the questions. Here’s what it came up with for me:

    Thoughtful to the extreme, you are often obsessed with perfection and the rules governing your own personal interests. Your world is black and white. You love to work within a logical system, such as language, computer programming, or mathematics. Manipulating a system that can be completely understood is a distinct pleasure to you, because of your confidence in the underlying veracity of your belief system. Because of your appreciation for logic and order, those who speak or think in a sloppy manner are apt to generate more than their share of wrath. Although very amiable, you are not drawn to friendships out of a sense of personal need. You are just as happy by yourself with a good book or puzzle. Because you are so involved with thought, you will on occasion have difficulty dealing with the day-to-day problems of a normal life. Taking out the trash, doing the dishes, these are often left until the last possible moment, if at all.

    There are certain aspects of that that resonate, particularly the “Manipulating a system that can be completely understood is a distinct pleasure to you,” bit, but I don’t think I’m actually that logical or black and white a thinker.

  4. cofax7

    It’s apparently designed to illustrate the Forer Effect; in essence, the test has no meaning.

    • Marie Brennan

      Innneresting, given my reactions to the other descriptions I’ve seen — ‘s felt very apropos to me, but others did not.

      Anyway, it doesn’t change the weird effect the test had on me. I still feel like it did something cool while I wasn’t looking.

    • Anonymous

      This. Is what I was trying to say in my comment.

      If we take the test as a piece of concept art illustrating this principle, it’s brilliant. Making people choose between two strobe-lit octagons with the prompt “Which one can hear you breathing?” — that’s so creepy and terrifying that it’s awesome.

    • wshaffer

      That implies some interesting things about how most people see themselves. Because while a lot of the stuff in the answers is pretty obvious waffle that could be stretched to describe just about anyone (“Many times you are referred to as your own worst enemy,” or “While in the excitement of the moment you can obsess about a task at hand”) some of the statements make what seem to be pretty specific claims. (“Your world is black and white,” “You also have no respect for authority…” or “Usually cynical and rarely trusting of others…”) I wonder if this means that most people would agree with these statements made about themselves, or if the test designers are just counting on people to be able to rationalize away the occasional statement that doesn’t fit.

      • Marie Brennan

        I think the latter is definitely part of it, but on the balance I find the “diagnoses” from this test have a higher degree of specificity — or rather, a lower degree of internal contradiction — than a lot of other things I’ve seen.

  5. genarti

    …Wow. I have no idea what that tests, I have no idea how, and I spent the entire time thinking “ANY OR ALL OR NONE OF THESE DEPENDING ON HOW YOU REFRAME IT!” And yet the answer I got is likewise reasonably accurate:

    You have a poetic sensibility and an ability to see beyond the day to day. You often seem to be living in a higher realm, or to be not-of-this-earth. Occasionally you imagine interior lives for friends and associates that are near-complete fabrications based on your fears or hopes for the future. You are often not aware of your own feelings. You have a strong sense of right and wrong, and because of this are often disappointed. Despite what can sometimes be a destructive inward-turning anger, you are very gentle. You are sometimes a bit out of touch with the ebb and flow of modern life. If your behavior is out of synch with your moral values, a severe psychic disturbance can result. Because connectivity is so important to you, you can become quiet and sulky if you feel that others around do not understand your point of view.

    It’s not right in every single particular — self-destructive anger is not really one of my standout traits — but it’s definitely very resonant.

    I’m trying to figure out if this is really testing something significant, or just giving us the sort of very broad descriptions one sees in horoscopes sometimes, such that almost anything seems to apply to the reader. It’s hard to tell!

    • Marie Brennan

      This one doesn’t seem half so broad to me as a lot of horoscope descriptions (given that your description, for example, is one I couldn’t see in myself at all), but yeah. Even if the effect is just a gimmick, it’s still cool.

      Weird-ass questions, man. They were worth the price of admission all on their own.

      • genarti

        They were! I have to admit, there’s a surreal entertainment value just in the experience of staring at a blurry red circle and a blurry red blob and debating which one wants to betray you…

  6. mastadge

    I got a different diagnosis*, but had a similar test-taking experience and similar feelings about the results.

    *Though quiet on the outside, you are often the hidden hero; someone who rushes in when needed and then after the emergency is over fades back into the woodwork. Because of this sense of duty and honor, you can also on occasion be rigid in your viewpoint and unyielding in the face of other ways of thinking. Usually cynical and rarely trusting of others, you maintain a small set of intimate friends. These bonds are stronger than most. You are always grounded in the present moment. Your close bonds can also lead to clique-ishness and a tendency to gossip about those who are deemed less worthy. You are an integrative thinker, collecting data from a wide range of sources and applying it to your worldview. You can become overly task-oriented. In stressful situations you often withdraw from the world to seek peace in contemplation. You often seem cold and withdrawn. Often you will withdraw rather than verbalize your discontent.

    • Marie Brennan

      I could see myself decently well in that one — maybe about 50/50.

    • mq_musings

      I just took it, and this is *exactly* the result that I got, word for word. I suppose given that there’s a finite number of combinations, there’s a finite number of answers, but… yeah. More like astrology, I think.

      Also, only about half of that fits me.

      • Marie Brennan

        Oh, finite answers, certainly. That’s almost always the case for things like this, though sometimes they’re modularly assembled.

  7. alessandriana

    Hmmm, fascinating. I had a hard time answering the questions, though– none of them can hear me breathing! nobody wants to betray me! they’re inanimate shapes! ;p

    I got:

    Quiet and very self-assured, you tend to keep your own council. Pragmatic and practical to a fault, you are not one to worry about the finer points of philosophical discourse. In fact, because you are very much an individualist, you often finds yourself at odds with the established truth or the wishes of the majority. You will often earn the wrath of an employer by taking upon yourself decisions which are rightly those of your manager. You are not one to take credit unless it is deserved. Similarly however, you will also not happily give credit where it is not due. In a romantic relationship you can be very frustrating. While you do care deeply and sincerely, and are willing to work at a relationship, your confidence in your own abilities can on occasion make it difficult to see the world from a partner’s point of view. Quiet and stoic at times, you can drive a more emotional individual completely up the wall. You can become overstressed and fatigued without knowing it. Taking time to rest between bouts of hard work can help to prevent a breakdown later on.

    Which is certainly true to a certain extent– quiet, self-assured, and pragmatic? yes– but other bits I’m not so sure about. I identify more with ‘s, I think– and not at all with ‘s.

    • Marie Brennan

      Your last three lines would be spot on for me.

    • mojave_wolf

      I also got …

      Quiet and very self-assured, you tend to keep your own council. Pragmatic and practical to a fault, you are not one to worry about the finer points of philosophical discourse. In fact, because you are very much an individualist, you often finds yourself at odds with the established truth or the wishes of the majority. You will often earn the wrath of an employer by taking upon yourself decisions which are rightly those of your manager. You are not one to take credit unless it is deserved. Similarly however, you will also not happily give credit where it is not due. In a romantic relationship you can be very frustrating. While you do care deeply and sincerely, and are willing to work at a relationship, your confidence in your own abilities can on occasion make it difficult to see the world from a partner’s point of view. Quiet and stoic at times, you can drive a more emotional individual completely up the wall. You can become overstressed and fatigued without knowing it. Taking time to rest between bouts of hard work can help to prevent a breakdown later on.

      Which is not exactly spot on. I ain’t quiet. I’m not particularly self=assured. And I ain’t stoic. Also, yeah, *sometimes* practical & pragmatic, but often not. So.

      The philosophical discourse– I’m still thinking. That’s one of those “yes/no/both/neither” things. Which is rather how I wanted to respond to much of that test.
      “Neither! Neither one is angry! I’m angry for you trying to make me say one is. Where is the ass to kick? And cute little non-angry thingies, let me hug you!” My thoughts were like that throughout, except I was trying to go as fast as I could because I figured if there was a subconscious triggering mechanism, hitting fast would enable it to work better than deliberating.

      Ah well, still I loved it. Trippy surrealism should be much encourged. Gratzi for the link.

  8. teleidoplex

    I took this a few days ago, and I had the same problem. Stymied on so many questions because I was like: “how do I answer that *without* creating some kind of narrative?”

    By the end, the questions were a little scary. Like… the test was trying to thought-control me.

    • Marie Brennan

      I know, right? If you told me this was actually a different psych experiment, about instilling paranoia or something in the test subjects, I would totally believe you.

      • Anonymous

        Especially given the message on the last page: “Click here to continue this test at a time and place of our choosing.”

        I clicked on the link. Now I’m afraid.

        • mojave_wolf

          I did too. Too good an opportunity for beautiful exploration, thrilling disaster rolling my way and/or further trippiness to pass up.

  9. almaeron

    Mine feels pretty spot on for my personality:

    “Thoughtful to the extreme, you are often obsessed with perfection and the rules governing your own personal interests. Your world is black and white. You love to work within a logical system, such as language, computer programming, or mathematics. Manipulating a system that can be completely understood is a distinct pleasure to you, because of your confidence in the underlying veracity of your belief system. Because of your appreciation for logic and order, those who speak or think in a sloppy manner are apt to generate more than their share of wrath. Although very amiable, you are not drawn to friendships out of a sense of personal need. You are just as happy by yourself with a good book or puzzle. Because you are so involved with thought, you will on occasion have difficulty dealing with the day-to-day problems of a normal life. Taking out the trash, doing the dishes, these are often left until the last possible moment, if at all.”

    Except for leaving the dishes to the last moment… but I actually do them daily as a logical way to keep them clean, and because I enjoy the mechanical nature of the exercise. I did kinda read it in the same fashion I took the test though, which is reacting to it quickly. I suspect that’s how they intend the test to be taken, so if you read the results quickly as well you may have a tendency to come away with the parts that sound right…

    • Marie Brennan

      Probably, yeah. I had to keep prodding myself to just answer the questions, rather than actually trying to think about them (because that way lay narrative).

  10. la_marquise_de_

    This is me, apparently:
    “Though quiet on the outside, you are often the hidden hero; someone who rushes in when needed and then after the emergency is over fades back into the woodwork. Because of this sense of duty and honor, you can also on occasion be rigid in your viewpoint and unyielding in the face of other ways of thinking. Usually cynical and rarely trusting of others, you maintain a small set of intimate friends. These bonds are stronger than most. You are always grounded in the present moment. Your close bonds can also lead to clique-ishness and a tendency to gossip about those who are deemed less worthy. You are an integrative thinker, collecting data from a wide range of sources and applying it to your worldview. You can become overly task-oriented. In stressful situations you often withdraw from the world to seek peace in contemplation. You often seem cold and withdrawn. Often you will withdraw rather than verbalize your discontent.”
    Weird, because I am a congenital worrier and thus the present tends to be overlooked in favour of the what-if. But a disturbing test, because some of those shapes are, well, wrong.

  11. rachelmanija

    What’s striking to me is that if you try to honestly tackle the questions as if you really believed them, you probably get a teeny sense of what it’s like to be psychotic and paranoid. The octagons can hear you breathing! The bedsheet will betray you!

  12. tooth_and_claw

    Amusingly, I got the exact same answer as you did. Considering how very, very different we are, I’m not putting too much stock into it.

    • Marie Brennan

      Yeah, it clearly doesn’t have the kind of structured approach that would probably ensure more reliable (but less potentially freaky) results.

  13. diatryma

    I haven’t seen mine in the comments yet, but I didn’t copypaste it. I am rulebound: the IRS agent who thinks that if something has worked before, why change it? Rules, dislike of change, nailed me.

    I am now wondering what kind of freakytastic alternate reality I have avoided by not clicking the further-testing link.

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